Self

What You Need To Stop Doing In Order To Be Happy

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Achieve Without A Struggle

Loss. Defeat. Surrender. These words often elicit a negative connotation within you.

If you pause to notice your reaction to even just reading these words, you might detect a slight dip in your emotions. As humans, most of us are wired to win, achieve, and succeed.  

How do we generally attempt to "win" in our own personal worlds? We push, we strive, we struggle. In a word, we "do."  

The struggle — the fight to win — often becomes an obstacle to finding happiness. 

What I've found is that there is something equally as powerful as "doing" in creating the lives we desire. It involves letting go of the struggle.

As counter-intuitive as it might sound, you don't always have to struggle to get what you need or want — to make your dreams come true.

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The secret to getting your desires without struggling.

What if there was a way you could flow with life, with all of its unexpected twists and turns, and still end up in a place you enjoy? Doesn’t that sound easier than constantly "struggling" to achieve what we desire? 

According to Isaac Newton’s third law of motion, "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." 

What if this applies not only to physics but also to life in general?

For example, what if I told you that there are opposite forces at play that are just as powerful in creating the life you desire as pushing, striving, and struggling? What might those “opposite” forces look like? 

To begin with, consider the power of acceptance, non-resistance, and being.

Some of you immediately might jump to, "How can 'acceptance' create the life I desire in the same way that 'striving' can?"

That’s a legitimate question. In fact, you were likely taught there's a direct correlation between the amount of effort you put forth and the level of success you achieve. 

But consider this: Stopping can be equally (if not more) powerful than going. A simple yet important example would be running a red or yellow light. It could be life or death. 

Resting can be as necessary as training. Ask any professional athlete or trainer and they will tell you that rest and recovery are vital to any successful athletic pursuit. 

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Sitting can create more change than moving, one of the greatest examples being Rosa Parks on a city bus.

I’m not really trying to convince you that you should stop doing everything. Certainly, it’s fairly easy to see the cause and effect of some of our actions.

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Sow a seed today, water and tend to it, and you’ll get to reap the fruits of your labor at some point in the future. 

However, there are multiple approaches to crafting a life you desire. If something that you're doing feels like a "struggle" that likely comes out of misalignment with something in your life. 

So if you feel like you're struggling or striving, take that as an opportunity to pause and check-in with yourself.

Is this action really in alignment with who you are, in this moment, and where you want to head?

If the answer is "no," then great. You have saved yourself the wasted effort.

If the answer is “yes”, also great. You now have a better understanding of why you are doing what you are doing and also a clear goal to aim for. 

My encouragement to you is to try to flow with life when and where you can. To align yourself with what's already at work in the universe and to ease your white-knuckle grip from the steering wheel of your life.

Allow life some opportunities to surprise you. You may be amazed by where you end up. 

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Troy Madsen is a certified Psychedelic Integration Professional who's passionate about supporting individuals along their personal healing journey. Learn more about Troy and his work on his website

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